To The Fit Woman At Marketplace Foods

You told your friend it was nice to see someone like me buy vegetables “for a change.” You know, because you have been shopping with me before to see what I buy.

I haven’t written much lately, and that bugs me. After over two years of musings and information, why go dark?

Sure I needed to pause and focus elsewhere during the election, but that’s over a month gone now, what’s the problem?

I’m down 80 pounds and it’s not like I’m gaining, it’s coming off.

It’s been bugging me for a while.

Today I had a 4+ hour road trip. So I downloaded podcasts and set up a list of them and set out with a mug AND thermos of tea. The roads were clear, but the low clouds/ fog made it a bit of a drab drive.

I went from the BBC’s Friday Night podcast (humour) into a new find – Paleo Geeks, and then into some Jimmy Moore.

Listening to Jimmy, I realized that while I hadn’t strayed back into my old eating ways, my adherence to Keto was slipping significantly. I was very much following a Paleo diet, but the pillars of Keto: high fat, medium/low protien, low carb, had slipped. I was still fairly low- carb, but the high fat was missing.

I realized that most of my podcasting, search for motivation and inspiration was in the Paleo world.

To be honest I’d steered away from Jimmy Moore as I found the “book sales” aspect distracting. I don’t want to be “sold” all the time. And he’d taken a break to write his next book and the podcasts were not what I was looking for…and as we know…the world revolves around me!

But today listening I was reminded of all the reasons why Keto works for me, and I found my focus.

For all my strengths, I recognize I am very much influenced by my environment. And since I was spending “car time” with Paleo folks, that was what permeated my subconscious.

The best news is that I think, when I reach goal, I can either stay Keto, or broaden my food choices into a Paleo world, and know I won’t regain the weight.

I was so excited with this revelation – was very troubled to have lost my way – I stopped and bought Jimmy’s book.

I need to get back to the fundamentals. Jimmy helped me get started, Jimmy needs to help me keep going.


The 11 Most Destructive Nutrition Lies Ever Told

It kills me we’re told such insane nonsense, to sell food.  It’s never about health, it’s always about the money.

Do you know what regular food tastes like when all the fat has been taken out of it? Well, it tastes like cardboard. No one would want to eat it.

The food manufacturers know this and therefore they add other things to compensate for the lack of fat. Usually these are sweeteners… sugar, high fructose corn syrup or artificial sweeteners like aspartame.

Sugar is evil!




So it’s been a bit of a struggle lately, and that’s ok.  Thank you to everyone who tweeted and messaged me after my earlier post about hitting a rough patch.

I got to spend some time in the car on Friday so I was doing some thinking and listening to Podcasts.

I was thinking about the months where I was able to get to the gym 5-6 days a week and thinking about what I was doing then to motivate me to do it.  I was trying to go back to those moments, to mimic that level of energy.

I knew there was no lack of commitment, no lack of drive, I am tired and was defaulting to “recovery” and it wasn’t/isn’t working for me.

Then I listened to this podcast: Amy Clover: How Amy Beat Depression With A Dumbbell

And I realized my own brain chemistry was part of the problem.  I needed to just make a plan, stick to it, and ignore the inner voice, the inner emotions and just go through the motions, regardless of how I felt about what I was doing.  I knew the positivity would follow.

So Saturday morning I got up, got dressed and went to the gym.  Did 20 minutes on a bike and 10 on the treadmill.  A few weights and then called it a day.

I felt great.  I felt back in the routine.  I knew I was on the right track.

Saturday night, 10:30 pm, usually I’m asleep, but a great band was playing at a local bar, so I went OUT!

I never go out.

$15 on diet coke, so didn’t derail my efforts with drinking, both budget and sugar, and danced up a storm!



This morning, step on the scale and I’m down 5lbs.

Shock and awe!

When I’m stalled, the only way it seems to break it is to really change up the physicality of what I’m doing.  I was stalled last winter, started training for the triathlon and the scale started moving again.

Watching my food is not enough for me.  They say it’s 80% food, 20% exercise, but for me, the exercise is much more significant.

So if numbers matter, I’m down 79 lbs and the scale is now in the 100’s.  Onderland as they call it!

If my knees were less achy (left the bar when the knees gave out) I couldn’t be any happier!


overwhelmed-pms-400x4001Haven’t been posting much lately, and not really sure why.

I know by the time I get home from work, I’m not really entertained by technology and wanting to be on the internet, or on the computer for that matter.

My weightloss has plateaued.  I don’t want to say stalled, because I think a stall happens when you do all the things you need to do, and you don’t lose weight.  I’m eating the way I need to, but only getting to the gym 1-2 times a week.  Which for me is not enough.  I’m not gaining and the muscle tone is still there, but we’re in a lull.

I am experiencing low grade muscle pain which I can’t figure out the source for.

I’m thinking general fatigue.  I keep forgetting to take the supplements and I know I need my minerals, especially iron.

I want to get to the gym, and I’m thrilled when I get there, but when I get up and I look at the car, buried in snow, and I’m cold, always so cold, I just feel overwhelmed by the sheer effort required to get going.  And some days I just go into work because the peace and quiet of 6 am ensures that I can get some work done.

I’m also out of goals.  I finished the 100 miles, I did the triathlon, I did the 5K. Not sure where to focus next, and “get healthier and lose more weight” isn’t enough.  I enjoy the challenges, and like when they come out of nowwhere.  So just making a goal for the sake of making a goal isn’t going to work for me.

And right now, feeling so burnt out, not sure I want the pressure of a goal.

So bare with me as I figure this all out.



Wordless Wednesday


Well that explains it

I’ve been listless, achy and generally feeling under the weather.  I thought it was the greys of November and just the arrival of the true damp cool of winter.

But then I wanted to chew ice cubes! Pagophagia

Pagophagia is a form of the disorder pica involving the compulsive consumption of ice or iced drinks. It has been associated with iron deficiency anemia, and shown to respond to iron supplementation

I ran out of iron supplements during the election, and as always, budgeting looks at priorities and the adrenalen was keeping me going and I wasn’t listening to my body.

But now I feel the ache and muscle tiredness and I took a another gym break, thinking I’d just jumped back into too hard after a month off.  But low iron and low Bs would explain it. (Ran out of the Bs last week)

I’m also really hungry, all the time.  Like growling tummy hungry, not bored mindless eating hungry.

Near the end of the election my blepharospasm started back up again.  I wasn’t surprised, it’s a twitch directly related to stress levels.  But it hasn’t stopped.

The benign essential blepharospasm is a focal dystonia—a neurological movement disorder involving involuntary and sustained contractions of the muscles around the eyes. The term essential indicates that the cause is unknown, but fatigue, stress, or an irritant are possible contributing factors.

My poor body, it needs to scream at me for me to listen to it.

I hear ya, I hear ya!ugh


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